What is the difference between “bashing” and “tough love”?
Discussion
45 comments
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Both cater to the manipulators sadistic motives.
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Bashing is only meant to bring a person down and nothing more…. tough love is meant to tell the absolute truth and hope they can see where they have made mistakes and hope they can see what they need to do to correct it.
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No such thing as tough love
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Motive and desire
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Tough love is letting one learn from their mistakes for example. Bashing would simply be insulting one for their mistakes etc.
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Bashing is tearing someone down to build yourself up. Tough love is being firm to build them up.
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Constructive criticism, instead of just pointing out mistakes out of anger.
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People on FB bash
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Depends on whose Ox is being Al Gored
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The heart.
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Your heart.
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Intent
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Bashing is hate, tough love, if U know how to apply it, it’s beneficial and real love, because U care.
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What about “tough hate”? Just saying
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The first is not love
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Intent
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Size of the stick !
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Love shares the Truth in love spiritually or a natural topic
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People choose to be offended they were offended by what Jesus said
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Bashing: where one downs someone who has done wrong in front of people and you may showcase their sins in front of others.
Tough love is private, you don’t let one hand know what the other has done. -
Bashing another is being carnal, and boastful.
Tough love means telling the truth, and they will either take it, or leave it.
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Proverbs 27:5 Open rebuke is better than secret love.
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Tough love is gracious and gentle, it does not use insults or put-downs, name-calling or demeaning, but it does call out sin and invite a person to repentance.
Bashing means you attack the PERSON rather than the idea or the sin. Like, someone disagrees with you call them stupid, or you accuse their motives of being wrong. Or they did something wrong, and you call them good-for-nothing or something.
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What if I say someone’s works are evil?
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What if I say God hates their doctrine?
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What if I say God is angry with the wicked everyday, or God hates all workers of iniquity?
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On a Christian Apologetics page, I feel like I should be seeing more Scripture when giving answers, and I see little, if any, being used.
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John 7, Rev 2, Ps 2, Ps 7. I could also reference John 1,
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My opinion: bashing someone will always result in glorifying your own self, tough love rebukes will end up for the good and edification of the other person.
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You’ll know it’s tough love if u have a deep sense of love for an individual and your biggest fear is their eternal damnation . Bashing is what normally do and you’ll know it’s bashing if you feel better about your sin when you point out someone else’s . Pray for me brothers and sisters. Insecurity is my sin
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If tough love don’t work, I’m gonna be bashing you!
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If it’s being done for the Glory of God out of love, vs, a heart filled with gossip, selfishness, and arrogance.
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Read Job. It’s pretty much the same.
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The heart and motive
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It’s in the attitude of the person and in the way the correction is presented.
Is it out of an attitude of pride and anger, or in humility and compassion?
Are you presenting the truth harshly abrasively, or graciously with empathy? -
The intention of the heart. Are you merely domineering and pointing out their flaws, or are you, out of genuine concern for repentance and reconciliation, highlighting an issue to restore the relationship?
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The people that is doing it
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Doing to others what you would like them to do for you.
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Is it targeted at the person or the behavior?
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Open rebuke is better than secret love
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One is done out of loving consequence
The other is done out of anger -
Bashing thrives in tearing down and destroying, tough love is motivated by care and concern for the person.
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Evil oppressive ways, methods and means do not reflect the Holy Love of God and one’s fellow man – that includes children, but when dealing with children: the “spare the rod, spoil the child” is a wisdom that keeps children from continuing in evil, unless you have exceptionally wise children who fear God and the rod that not only a loving parent can use, but God can and does as well.
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Tough love is letting your loved ones own up to their mistakes. It is not ” rescuing ” from consequences of their actions. For example, if they get arrested for drunk driving. Let the justice system take its course. If we raise our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord we hopefully will not have to practice tough love
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