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I decided to not look.

I kept my eyes frozen on the path ahead of me,
ignoring the temptation to inflict upon my brain
another sad memory of what could never be.

I sighed – deeply,
from the depths of my disease riddled lungs.

I shuffled my feet and began to hum.

Long ago, I refused to buy in to the lie
that true happiness is found in
the things I don’t have.

I came to the conclusion that real joy
is found in the journey ahead of me.

So, I just keep walking.

This poem © Kevin Walker. Published February 2014.
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Living and serving Him to build up His church is so worth it! I am living the dream everyday!  Whenever someone asks me hows life and ministry, my standard response to them this past year has been, “It’s scary, exciting, and fun all at the same time.” These are a few lessons I lived and learned with family, ministry, and leadership.  Just jotted them down to hopefully be an encouragement to you. 



1. WENT ALL IN
– God talks through even your children.  Ask me about it!

– Took a step of faith individually and as a family into full-time ministry.  

– It was time and the step out and the step in was official on May 1st.

– Obvious fears were focused on the practicalities of raising a family on Long Island.

– Sang, preached, read, and heard about “Jehovah Jireh”.  This year we saw Jehovah Jireh.
“O taste and see that the LORD is good: blessed is the man who trusts in him.” – Psalms 34:8



2. LOVE LANGUAGES
– Realized that I can’t love everyone the same way.  Tough love doesn’t always work. Tender loving care doesn’t always work either.  Balance it out.

- Realized that everyone will not love me the same way.  

– Realized that people will not love you or even like you.  The haters will always be there.  Some were expected and some were surprising.  If anyone says it doesn’t take a toll on them, they are lying.  I definitely experienced some hurt and deep wounds this past year.  God is transforming those wounds into scars.  Wounds will always hurt but scars are just reminders.  

- Realized Jesus loves me, this I know, for the Bible tells me so … =) about to start singing …



3. LET’S GO
– I’m a big picture person who still tries to keep a handle on the details at times.  I’m already thinking about 2015 and beyond…just saying! 

– Everyone doesn’t move at your pace or even at God’s pace for their lives.

- While I’ve learned to slow down at times thanks to a great family and ministry team, they’ve learned to speed up.  (Don’t know if they would thank anyone for that.)

- Learning that some are born leaders while others are developed leaders.  Born or made, all need to be learning and growing servant-leaders.

– Learned that all may not be ready for the call on their life or for the vision and mission of the church.

– Leads to the next lesson learned…



4. THREE WORDS
– My prayers to God in relation to family, leadership, and pastoral ministry from the beginning of the year were centered around these 3 words: patience, wisdom, and discernment. 

– Lord give me the patience to see growth and lives change in a moment and through a process.

- Lord give me the heavenly wisdom to handle every situation and challenge with grace and humility.
– Lord give me the discernment to see what you see. 

- That prayer has not changed just because its a new year.  Need more of all as expectations, demands, vision, and hopes grow.  



5. BE AN ORIGINAL
– At times, I got caught red-handed playing the comparison game as a pastor, leader, and church. 

- I’m not made to be someone else.  I’m not created by Him to be a carbon copy. I am created by Jesus to be His child and His servant. 

- I’m not a puppet for man to speak through but an instrument and tool in God’s hands to use and speak through.

- He constantly reminded me to take on His identity.  As I did, He led me into greater levels of revelation in Him and His Word.  Putting on Christ is the best decision made.  

- I was surprised a few times by what He was doing in and through me.  Almost was afraid of what was happening and had to trust Him in the moment.  

- I know I am here, I am a sinner, I am forgiven, and I am called.  I am a husband, father, son, brother, friend, pastor, servant-leader. 

- God take me, use me, and send me for your purpose and glory!



I’m thankful for what God has done and is doing.  I’m not looking to be successful but just be faithful with God has given to me.  I look forward to what lies ahead.  I press on because Jesus is calling.  



I don’t mean to say that I have already achieved these things or that I have already reached perfection. But I press on to possess that perfection for which Christ Jesus first possessed me. No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead, I press on to reach the end of the race and receive the heavenly prize for which God, through Christ Jesus, is calling us. (Philippians 3:12-14 NLT)



Enjoyed The Ride,

Pastor Cee

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“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily hinders our progress. And let us run with endurance the race that God has set before us. We do this by keeping…Read more Sermon: Keep Your Motor Running

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The tongue can bring death or life… Proverbs 18:21, NLT

Words are powerful. “Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall!” “I have a dream!” “Ask not what your country can do for you. Ask what you can do for your country!” “December 7th, 1941, a date which will live in infamy…” “Today, I consider myself the luckiest man on the face of the earth.” 

Will you choose to speak life?
The Bible teaches us that even the power of life and death can be found in our words. We can hurt or help. We can display anxiety or peace. We can speak forth anger or love. Words are powerful. Your words are powerful. No wonder they are often so hard to control! But, like everything else in our lives, we’re called to place even the words we speak under control of the Holy Spirit. What happens as we learn to do that? Negativity turns to hope. Anger turns to love. Judgment turns to compassion. Simply put, what we say begins to resemble more of what Jesus would say. And that is life-changing… even world-changing! Today, let’s choose to SPEAK LIFE.
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I decided to join Master’s Commission because I knew that I had a calling on my life to go into ministry, but I had no idea what it was. I imagined it would be along the lines of working with youth ministry, but I didn’t know any of the details.

Throughout this year, little pieces of the puzzle have started to become clearer to me. For almost 3 months now I’ve been having the same dream, and it made me wonder if it was just a really good dream or if God was trying to show me something. I didn’t tell anyone about it, simply because I wasn’t sure what it meant. It bothered me that I didn’t know, so I began praying about it every day, for God to reveal to me the meaning of the dream.

Then, I got a call from a friend back in Chicago that I haven’t talked to in almost 2 years. She told me that she had a dream about me the night before, and then described the exact dream that I had been having every night.

Wow.

The dream was that I was working with the youth of Australia, ministering and counseling them as they walk through life. At one point in the dream I’m even running a huge worship event there (again… WOW).


Once I got the call from my friend, I decided to go back into prayer, asking God to confirm a calling that I have had on my heart for a while now. 



“Keep asking, and it will be given to you. Keep searching, and you will find. Keep knocking, and the door will be opened to you.”
-Matthew 7:7

This past weekend, we participated at a youth conference called Surge the City. During the weekend, I was feeling really drained, and during the last service I found myself crying out to God and asking Him if His anointing was still on my life.

And then we all got called out.

Pastor Pat (the speaker) called the Master’s Commission students that were there to come to the stage. Long story short, I got called out and that whole room full of people suddenly knew that I had doubted the anointing on my life. But then Pat said something to me that put me at ease (and made me burst into tears). He said that he had doubted the anointing on his life for over 10 years, and that I wasn’t alone.
As I sat on the stage, both praying and crying, I heard God telling me that He was using the events of my life to train me for the anointing that I have on my life. That I was going to help bring the prodigals back to Him in a land that is far from where I am now. The whole time, I was seeing the images and scenes from my dream.

And for the first time since it all started, I felt completely at peace about it. Not only that, but I am EXCITED about the plans that God has for my life! I felt the chains of fear, insecurities, and self-worth begin to fall off, and a sense of confidence and joy began to fill my body.


I did a little bit of research this morning about Australia, and here is some of what I’ve found:

Only 9% of Australia’s entire population actively attends church and matches their actions with their faith.
In addition to that, out of the youth (ages 13-18) that is counted in that 9%, 1 in 4 will leave the church by the time that they graduate high school.


And now I know that I am going to change that.

~Paige