Why are you shouting at me?

“Tone is the hardest part of saying no.” ― Jonathan Price, Put That in Writing

Tone matters.

The way you say something is crucial if you hope to communicate well.

However…

Tone is not all-important.

Imagine with me that you are walking down a corridor and up ahead, down the next hallway, you hear an angry conversation in progress.

Just as you are approaching the intersection of the corridors you hear an especially angry outburst that is confusing…someone shouts, “Because I love you!!!”

What’s that all about?

Then you turn the corner and all becomes clear. It is a parent having a “conversation” with their teenager. And if you are currently or have been a parent of a teenager you understand.

There’s definitely a better way to say, “I love you” than angrily, but nevertheless, we can have no doubt that the words are true…from the heart true.

And so it is in our world today.

There are so many emotions swirling around.

Angry people, shouting people, opinionated people, confused people, lying people, hurting people…you get the picture.

But remember this, as important as tone is, it is not all-important. What we must ask before tuning someone out is this: “Is is true?”

Not, “Do I agree?” Or, “Do I like this person?” But, “Is it true?”